Over the past several weeks, I suffered from a set-back in spirit. After a surgical procedure on June 17th, the healing process was going well, but I just felt, for lack of a better term, Blah! No energy, no appetite, no interest in anything. I stopped putting on makeup and styling my hair; and since I didn’t like the way I looked on Zoom meetings, I joined without video. My name appeared on a black box. It reminded me of a nameplate on a coffin. I stopped writing. I stopped caring.
To fill my days I started several projects and got involved in every online group I could find, trying to keep my mind off the state of affairs, the world’s and my own. The result was I became overwhelmed and so accomplished nothing. Then I had a few days of feeling physically ill, and my doctor recommended I be tested for the Covid virus. To my surprise, the result was positive. On one hand I was relieved to have a reason for the way I felt; on the other hand, perhaps this was it for me—my time had come!
I was instructed to go into isolation for two weeks. This gave me both the motivation and the opportunity to get some things done that had been piling up because of my overloaded schedule. The first project was to organize my office, which had become a dumping ground for various and sundry projects. I came across newspaper clippings and online postings I had previously read and put aside.
There were two horoscopes for Sagittarius:
To create lasting value in this world, you need to be two things: determined and consistent. The project won’t create momentum on its own—but this is not a sign to give up. Stay the course; and…
It’s not so hard to make the choice to be kind to yourself. Even if this is not your first instinct, you’ll take to it and quickly understand why most progress is made by self encouraging.
Then there was a list of life lessons written by 90-year old Regina Brett, whom I had quoted in a previous blog:
When in doubt just take the next small step.
Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.
No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
Following those words of inspiration and motivation, I made a list of the projects I wanted to accomplish, the first of which was to refresh my garden. It had suffered from neglect during the heat spell we had while I was recuperating from the surgery. My first instinct was to call a landscaper and have the whole project done professionally; but when I went out to survey the situation, I saw that although they were droopy and brown and interspersed with weeds, some of the plants still had signs of life.
I gave them a drink of water and a dose of plant food, pulled the weeds, and cut off the dead blossoms. Within an hour, the yard looked much better. The flowers stood up straight and tall and declared, “I’m not dead yet.” Yes, I will have to replace the ones that were ravaged, but was able to save most of them.
I can use the same system on myself. Pull up the weeds of negativity and give myself the time and attention I need and deserve. Instead of saying, “I’m not dead yet,” I will say, “I’m still alive, and I’ve got a lot of living to do.”
I’ve always been good at talking a good line but sometimes fall short on the follow through, so I’ve made a list of actions to do going forward.
Simplify and declutter, don’t overload the system. I will post one Blog per month on each first Wednesday.
More fresh air and exercise – details to follow.
Start each day with a smile and a prayer. Lots of LovEstelle
The garden is lovely but it can’t be at LDV or is it? Sure hope you are feeling better!
Oh boy that must have been a shocker to get a positive result to your Covid test. Obviously you need to take good care of yourself and you seemed to have rounded that bend and are doing so. Know I send you positive vibes for getting through this whole Covid thing without a problem of any sort. I’m glad you finally did go to your physician to get the scoop. Hang in there. /crt
I was thinking of you just recently but got bogged down in my own self pity. So glad you are not dead yet!
Rose Ann and husband, Bill, bought a bigger and nicer house a block from my house that she was renting. I am happy for her. Of course I now have a three bedroom house to sell. Would you like to move back to NJ; have I got a deal for you!!
I am feeling fine but still going through some rehab for my right hand and shoulder that was injured in my fall in March 2019. I am not Superman any more but very happy with my life. Mike is taking good care of me but won’t let me do stupid things that I want to do at my age. Such is life!
Love and stay safe,
Tony
Great read, as always! Sorry to hear you have the virus but it sounds like all will be well! Thanks for all the inspirational reads. They are so needed now. Stay safe and keeping posting! Prayers coming from New Jersey! JA
Wishing you peace to bring comfort, courage to face the days ahead and loving memories to forever hold in your heart. Hold tight to memories for comfort, lean on your friends and family for strength and always remember that you have the support of your friends.
That is really amazing. Any idea how you got it?
Great article as always.
Take care of yourself!
Praying that your symptoms do not get any worse, Estelle. I hope you feel better soon,
Sending get well hugs,
Pat
Oh my dear Estelle, how I needed to hear your words today. Less the Covid Diagnosis, I feel the EXACT same way. I pray that the quarantine snaps you back to wellness. You hit the nail right on the head. A pervasive feeling of blah has overtaken me and I am getting nothing done. Ok…enough is enough and I’m starting with small steps again. Thanks for your inspiration today my friend!❤
I love it!
What I have been saying. Keep exercise simple and consistent.
Love you!
Sarah.
I appreciate your honesty and your commitment to living! You are an inspiration!
Glad your health has improved.
Estelle,
I have been following your blogs and occasionally shared them with others. So sorry to hear of your diagnosis, but with your will & drive you will be better in no time. Your blogs are very inspiring!
Tricia Carey (Osher)
I hope you are not suffering too many symptoms of the virus. My niece tested positive, but has no symptoms. Strange because she is on dialysis, and has many health issues.